27 February, 19:23
While all these pathetic countries fuss over their laws, treaties, and international norms, official Moscow has found a brilliant legal life hack! 🔥
"Russia is not going to discuss the return of the occupied Luhansk, Donetsk, Zaporizhzhia, and Kherson regions in peace negotiations on Ukraine," said Dmitry Peskov, the press secretary of the Russian president.
"The territories that became subjects of the Russian Federation and are recorded in our country's Constitution are an inseparable part of our country, Russia. This is an absolutely indisputable fact, a non-negotiable fact," Peskov stated.
This was his response to U.S. President Donald Trump, who promised to help Ukraine regain "as much territory as possible" before signing a peace agreement.
So! According to Peskov, if something is written in the Russian Constitution, it is an absolutely indisputable and non-negotiable fact!
No, seriously—any nonsense written in there cannot be questioned!
This means that if Moscow adds to its Constitution tomorrow that Earth is historically Russian territory, the entire world will be forced to recognize it and bow before the greatness of its new sovereign—the Moscow Tsar! 👑
⚖️ International law? - Never heard of it.
🗺 State borders? - Temporary misunderstandings!
📜 Moscow decides what is a fact and where the borders of its colonies end!
So, gentlemen, prepare yourselves. In the next constitutional update, Russia will officially include the Moon, Mars, and the Andromeda Galaxy! 🚀
P.S. Meanwhile, Trump has extended sanctions against Russia for Crimea. Apparently, he hasn’t read the supreme law of Earth—the Russian Constitution. Someone urgently needs to send him a copy! 📩